Thursday, January 28, 2010

Pastor's Diary

I have, since January 19th, 1983, kept a diary/journal.  That is nothing to brag about.  Maybe it is narcisstic.  I once asked my children if there would be a problem with them fussing over who gets my diaries after I die.  They quickly assured me that would NOT be a problem.

There is something about going back and being reminded of historical events in my life and the lives of those around me.  Some of the entries remind me of the faithfulness of the Lord.  Some of them remind me of my own unfaithfulness (not in the marriage sense of unfaithfulness mind you!).  Early on, I was hesitant to write much about what I was thinking or what was happening around me.  It was more of a devotional reflection. The longer I wrote, however, the more I wrote about struggles, thoughts, temptations, victories, circumstances, etc.  For example, on July 14th, 1985 - right after I entered my first pastorate I wrote: My first communion (to lead as pastor).  Brother ____ forgot to supply juice.  But we finally got that straightened out.  Sunday night I forgot to take up the offering so I guess it was tit for tat.  Still in the throes of frustration as far as any type of routine is concerned.  I remember the Sunday morning.  How do you forget the grape juice (wine) for communion? 

Those early days of pastoring were exciting and exhausting.  On July 27th of 1985 I wrote Those preachers lied to me who said that pastoring is easier than seminary.  In September of that same year I said  It is hard to keep up.  I swing from depression to escstacy, from fear to faith.  God, please grant consistency in life and habit.  May my heart be consumed with a burning love for Jesus Christ.  I am still not completely settled into things here.  I intend to be sharing things from these diaries in future blogs.  Entirely for your entertainment and hopefully some edification. 

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